Your Sexual and Spiritual Self
Protecting your Energy
There are many Taoist techniques to transform negative energies and ground them into the Earth, which are useful in daily life and especially for therapists. When we connect intimately and physically with another we open up for energy exchange, which is the beauty of healing love dual cultivation. Yin and yang energies can balance each other and deep healing and cultivation can take place.
The depth to which we pick up the energy of lovers is something there is a lot of opinion about. Recent research by the University of Seattle and Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research has found that traces of men's DNA has been found in women's brains with the likelihood this came into their bodies during intercourse. Many spiritualists talk about taking on the DNA of our lovers, including ancestral DNA, and other energies.
This is controversial on a scene where polyamorous relationships are common. In my experience, these are often initiated by men with intimacy issues and a lot of bad energy to dump. The way I view it is that if a man wants a polyamorous relationship with me, he is not only unlikely to care about or meet my needs and we will not be able to experience deep intimacy. My experience is that men like this (usually but not always subconsciously) are looking for somewhere to dump their negativity and a few sites are better than one. This is a form of sexual vampirism and it is a real thing people try to do.
My personal experience is that I have taken energy from lovers. Before I cultivated, I was not aware of this as I was not aware of my energy. Since cultivating and becoming aware of my energy I have experienced being drained and developing minor blockages. These are all things that can be worked on to be cleared, and can also be symbiotic. We can have former lovers who we end up best friends with, like family, after our DNA mixes. Men can most likely experience similar things, although as women we are entered into and that is a different dynamic from entering into someone else.
Being lovers with someone, sharing sexual energy is a profoundly deep experience, even if we don't have sex. Energy is shared in a sacred and spiritual interaction that is the original spiritual drive of humans. We can all make our own choices, and may later decide not to repeat certain actions after seeing we don't like the results. Energies can affect us without us being aware what is happening, but if we really tune in and follow our instincts, and regularly engage in clearing practices, we have plenty of space to grow and learn.